Finding the Best Therapist for Kids with Autism: Our Personal Journey

When our developmental pediatrician told us that our son needed therapy, we were advised to start with an Occupational Therapist. I remember our first visit vividly. The therapy room was small, the walls were covered with cushions, and there were only two toys in sight. It didn’t feel child-friendly, and our son cried the entire time. It was heartbreaking for us as parents.

That experience began my search for the best occupational and speech therapist for my child.

Our first Occupational Therapist—let’s call him Teacher C—was based in Alres, Sta. Rosa, Laguna. From the very beginning, I could tell he wasn’t new in the field. He handled my son with patience and calmness, even during moments of tantrums. He was firm but never harsh. To this day, I believe he was one of the best therapists my son ever had.

Unfortunately, we had to leave that therapy center because they didn’t have a speech therapist available. We wanted our son to continue his occupational therapy while starting speech therapy in the same center, thinking it would be more convenient for him.

His new Occupational Therapist, Teacher A, was kind and did her best, but I occasionally saw her lose patience. I couldn’t help but compare her to Teacher C, who maintained composure no matter what happened.

When it came to speech therapy, our first Speech Therapist was a young man—nice, friendly, but still new. During our sessions, I noticed a few times that he was on his phone while my son was working, which made me uncomfortable. He also suggested using a gadget to help my son communicate, but at that time, we weren’t ready to take that route. We wanted to explore more natural methods first.

Eventually, we asked for a new speech therapist, and that’s when Teacher L came in. She was calm and patient, and my son responded well to her. Sadly, after a few months, she left for an opportunity abroad.

Her departure, however, turned out to be a blessing in disguise. We were referred to the owner of the therapy center—Teacher W—who was also a Speech Therapist. She was exceptional. My son adored her and made tremendous progress under her care. In just a few weeks, he started to talk! It felt like a miracle.

After about a year, we were informed that Teacher W would focus on children who needed more intensive attention. My son was then transferred to Teacher M, who was also good and nurturing. My son grew comfortable with her—sometimes a little too comfortable that he’d ignore her instructions—but she remained patient and caring.

Later on, we were assigned to several trainees. Some showed great potential and genuine care, while others seemed unsure if therapy was really their calling. Then the pandemic happened, and therapy stopped altogether.

Over those years of going to therapy two to three times a week, I saw many kinds of therapists. Some were amazing—gentle, firm, and creative. But I also witnessed therapists who would raise their voices at children, which was difficult to watch.

That’s why, if there’s one thing I’ve learned, it’s this: always be present during your child’s sessions whenever possible. Only then can you truly see if your child is in good hands. Because finding the best therapist for kids with autism isn’t just about credentials—it’s about compassion, patience, and the connection they build with your child.

How Long Should You Observe Before Deciding?

One question many parents often ask is: “How long should we observe before deciding if the therapist is the right fit?”

The truth is, there’s no fixed timeline. Every child is different, and many factors affect the pace of progress—such as your child’s current stage, the therapist’s approach, and how well they connect emotionally.

I once witnessed a child who cried during every session for a year with a lady therapist. When the parents switched to a male therapist, the child suddenly became calm and cooperative.

That experience taught me something valuable: we don’t have to wait too long if something feels off. Trust your instincts. If the connection isn’t working, it’s okay to make a change sooner rather than later.

How to Choose the Best Therapist for Kids with Autism

Here are some lessons I’ve learned along the way that may help other parents in their search:

1. Observe how your child responds. The best therapist isn’t necessarily the most experienced one, but the one who connects with your child. Notice if your child feels safe, relaxed, and engaged during sessions.

2. Watch how the therapist handles difficult moments. Meltdowns and frustrations are part of the process. A good therapist remains calm, firm, and kind even when things get challenging.

3. Be present during sessions. Whenever possible, stay and observe. You’ll learn a lot about your child’s progress and the therapist’s methods—and it helps you reinforce those techniques at home.

4. Check professionalism and focus. A therapist should be fully attentive during sessions. Small things—like avoiding distractions (for example, not using their phone)—show respect and dedication to your child’s development.

5. Trust your instincts. If something doesn’t feel right, it probably isn’t. Don’t hesitate to request a different therapist or look for another center that aligns with your child’s needs and your family’s values.

Final Thoughts

Finding the best therapist for kids with autism can be a long and emotional journey, filled with trial and error. But every experience—good or bad—teaches us something valuable about our child’s needs and how they learn best. Along the way, we discover that progress doesn’t happen overnight; it grows from patience, understanding, and the right connection between a child and their therapist.

Also, sometimes, as parents, we tend to measure how good a therapist is based on how fast our child progresses. But I’ve learned that therapy doesn’t end in the center—it continues in our home, in our everyday interactions, and even more so when we allow our children to explore nature and the outside world.

I was very fortunate to have a one-on-one call with a US-based Filipino therapist (a brother of a good friend). When I told him about the things we were doing and asked if we were missing anything, he assured me that letting your child explore in nature is one of the best therapies you can give.

That reminder stayed with me. It made me realize that while professionals play a crucial role, we, as parents, are also our child’s everyday therapists. And in the most natural environments—under the sun, with the wind, and surrounded by life—our children often find the calm, joy, and confidence they need to thrive.